Geeky SKAturday: Nazi White Trash (Choking Victim)

Happy weekend all!  Today's Geeky SKAturday is presented in celebration of Punch a Nazi Week, as presented this past week by Justin over at Halls of the Nephilim.  There's no sense in not getting in on the antifascist fun a little bit!

First, to be crystal clear about it before I'm assumed to be promoting violence, I am not actually in favor of punching Nazis...except, I guess, if it's necessary for the safety of others.  I'm a pretty old school peacenik, anti-violence perhaps to a fault, and I just believe that as humans, we are meant to be better than that.

With that said, any Nazis that do get punched had it coming to them.

Here's one of my favorite anti-Nazi tunes, from the band Leftöver Crack.  I share it with the obligatory acknowledgment that, from what I've heard and read, this band's frontman may not be a very admirable guy himself.  I certainly encourage you to learn what you can about that if it is of concern to you.  However, it doesn't change the fact that Leftöver Crack and the band they grew out of, Choking Victim, are tremendously influential ska/punk/crust/core acts, borderline legendary, and their "crack rock steady" sound absolutely blew many of us away back in the day.  Some of their tracks are still just unforgettable anthems.

Alright, sorry about all the caveats today.  Time to skank.  This one isn't about punching, but there's certainly some ill will wished upon them.  Here's "Nazi White Trash":

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I'm not sure that's the tune I want to turn into a sound for a Rudie to cast, though.  So, I'm gonna go back to the first song I heard from this crew, back when I was introduced to the band Choking Victim on Hellcat Records' first Give 'Em the Boot compilation, a crucial piece in many kids' musical journeys, almost 30 freaking years ago.

I love this track.  This is "Infested"...

Infested

2nd-level Sound

Casting time: 1 action

Range: 60 feet

Duration: 10 minutes

Save: Strength

This sound infests the target's body with lice.  A failed Strength save when cast means the target is treated as if it is Restrained (cannot move from current location, +1 to attacks targeting it, -1 to its attacks and any actions requiring Dexterity).  The target may reroll the save at the beginning of each turn.  With any successful save, the target is treated as Restrained but retains its normal ability to move for the duration of the spell.

If the spell remains in effect for the full 10 minutes, the target makes one final Strength save as it disappears.  If failed, the target takes 1D6-1 Rash damage, which can be healed as any other damage.

Brainstorming on monster training

In revisiting Pokémon Concierge...and thinking more about monsters in this "Monstrous6" set of rules I've somehow managed to not get distracted away from (despite that being my ADHDGMO*)...I've realized how little rules space has ever been devoted to mediating the interactions between player characters and monsters in pretty much any tabletop RPG I've ever played.

I guess the earliest application of this idea would be the monster Reaction Table introduced in 1974's original Dungeons & Dragons and carried through at least the full run of "old school" D&D rules.  Keith Hann, over at the blog Simulacrum: Exploring OSR Design, put together a nice overview of its changes through the editions.  The classic D&D approach is pretty...broad, I guess.  There's a lot for the DM to process and rule on.

In more modern editions of D&D (3rd forward), are there even official Reaction Tables to be used?  Seems to me that the closest analogue would probably be the use of a skill like Animal Handling (or, depending upon the monster, maybe Insight or Persuasion).  Even with these, it isn't clear how difficult to set a check.  Maybe there are just too many factors to take into account...the specific circumstances, the creature's intelligence, its history of interaction with PC-type beings, the intentions of the PCs, etc.  It might just not be worth it trying to nail down a precise procedure for "handling" a monster when that could have so many different looks.

Personally, I like what we see in West End Games' Star Wars Miniatures Battles: the Orneriness Code (which I have started to implement as Handling Difficulty).  I'm pretty sure I'll continue on this path.  I just have to figure out some pretty basic questions around it.  Like...who do I give this score to?  Is it just beings that lack intelligence of a human scale and variety?  What about something as smart (in a human way) as a chimpanzee, for whom the terms handling and training could even be interpreted as a bit insulting?  Surely Pokémon should get one (that's part of what prompted this post)...but the meaning of "handling" seems very different for a Mewtwo compared to, say, a Growlithe.

Images from Bulbapedia

I guess I need to do some thinking on this.  I don't doubt that there's going to be a great deal of DM fiat involved, and that's okay.  I dunno, is there something I'm missing here that needs to be taken into account?  Have I somehow, in my years of roleplaying, managed to avoid something crucial to inform my approach with this?

At any rate, here's Psyduck's evolved form, Golduck...who must be just a little more difficult to handle than its younger self, since as we all know, most Pokémon get tougher and angrier as they evolve...

Golduck

Also from Bulbapedia

5' 7" (1.7 m), 168.9 lbs (76.6 kg), Scale: --

Handling Difficulty (wild): 9

20 HP, 11 Defense

Movement: Swims at 3x walking speed

Type: Mind, Water

Weakness: Electric, Mind

Strength 2

Dexterity 3

Knowledge 1

Presence 3

Skills: Swim +6, Psychic Powers +3, Toughness +2

Attack: Headache (mental attack, 1D6 Mind damage; when hit, the target must make a Presence save or lose their next action) or 2x Claws (1D6 Slashing damage)

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* The G is for gamer.  You probably already know what ADHD and MO stand for.  It only seemed appropriate to initialize the whole thing...

Still worth a very big smile: Pokémon Concierge

On the subject of positivity:  Pokémon Concierge is still amazing.  This past Wednesday, Laura and I both wanted to watch something that would give us a quick boost of serotonin, dopamine, or some other happy little neurotransmitter...BUT we don't always agree on what sort of show fits that mold.  (I tend to go for cheap/cheesy/nostalgic SF or fantasy, while Laura gravitates toward...I guess it'd be fair to say semi-classic but fairly standard American television, often involving adults playing teenagers and that, in her words, "turns her brain off."  Think One Tree Hill and Dawson's Creek...)

But then she hit on the answer...and, as stated above, Pokémon Concierge is still amazing.  Hitting Netflix last December, this show is pretty much the streaming embodiment of the word delightful.  The stop-motion animation is just beautiful, and the story is so sweet it'll almost make you forget that it's a franchise based upon combat between intelligent creatures who live in servitude.  In fact, if there's anything negative someone could find with Pokémon Concierge, it's probably that: I'm sure it's just too damn adorable for some tastes.

Here's the trailer, in case you haven't been introduced to this masterpiece...

Yep.  Delightful.

(It's also really short.  I would love for 2025 to bring us a second season.)

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Now...for the violent part!  Here's a Psyduck (as one is a hero of the series) to be thrown into the Underground Elemental Beastfighting pits...

Psyduck

Image from here

2' 7", 43 lbs (Scale: --)

Handling Difficulty (wild): 8

10 HP, 11 Defense (small size)

Types: Mind, Water

Weakness: Electric, Mind

Strength 1

Dexterity 2

Knowledge 1

Presence 3

Skills: Psychic Powers +2, Toughness +1 (it has to endure that headache all the time...)

Attack: Headache (mental attack, 1D6-1 Mind damage; when hit, the target must make a Presence save or lose their next action)

Geeky SKAturday: Rudie Can't Fail (The Clash)

So.

That happened this week.

I'm taking some time to enjoy really positive things at the moment.  I think this song qualifies.  It's sort of about a struggle against a system, but it strikes me as both appropriate and hopeful right now.  Even the title is about as positive a statement as one can put together!

Personal note of interest to few beyond me:  I first heard this song thanks to the awesome Grosse Pointe Blank soundtrack.  That film came out at a critical point of musical exploration for me and some of my friends.  I can actually remember when Father Josh (then just...Josh) told me I had to hear this one.  It really is a top-notch tune, and definitely a strong contender for any desert island mix I would put together.

I guess I wouldn't necessarily even describe "Rudie Can't Fail" as wholly a ska/rocksteady/reggae song, but it's clearly very strongly influenced by Jamaican music.  And the fact that it's about Rudie...well, it fits the trend of these Geeky SKAturdays perfectly...

Another personal note of interest to few:  I would pay good money to hear Joe Strummer's take on the United States right now.  He had a good eye and a way with words.  Actually, you know what?  Just thinking about this song right now...I have to kind of wonder if part of what got us to this point is right here in these lyrics...

I went to the market to realize my soul

What I need I just don't have

So...here's the sound...

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Rudie Can't Fail

1st-level Sound

Casting time: 1 bonus action

Range: Self

Duration: 1 minute

This sound makes your next action very likely to succeed.  The next time you roll a skill check, magic check, attack, or save, you can reroll if the first attempt fails.  You can also reroll if the second attempt fails.  That's it, though!  Just three chances, and you have to use it within a minute of casting the sound (in-game time)...

Species for Monstrous6: The Michigan "I Voted" Wolf

So, anything important happening today?

/s

While we chew our nails and worry about what tomorrow brings, I thought it'd be fun to do a little dry run of writing out a species for the house RPG system I'm developing bit by bit, currently referred to as Monstrous6.  And to keep things on-theme with the events of the day, I'll look at a species that needs to be put into a game: the Michigan "I Voted" wolf...

From The Daily Beast

Some context for anyone outside the States or otherwise just not up to date on your patriotic anthro wolf sticker news:  The state of Michigan held a contest for kids to design new stickers to be given out at polling places as citizens vote, to replace the standard old "I Voted + a flag" design.  (Well, in Georgia, we eventually got a peach on ours...but that's nothing compared to what Michigan is doing...)  There were (I think) nine winners in total whose designs are being handed out to voters in Michigan.  The one that seemed to get the most attention, however, was this gem by Jane Hynous of Brownell Middle School in Grosse Pointe, MI (yep, that Grosse Pointe).

For obvious reasons.  This wolf is awesome.  I would not be shocked if we were to later find out that it was actually drawn by Rob Liefeld, who then handed it off to his niece Jane to be a ringer entry in the kids' contest.  I even ordered a couple for me and Laura (copies, I'm pretty sure, as it seems like folks are actually paying pretty good money for the real deal).

So, I'm gonna make this guy/gal into a species for roleplaying.  Just something simple, though...the species setup I imagine using for my house system going forward, modeled after the way it was handled in Star Wars D6:

A tribute to the wolf by Katelyn Windels on Instagram

American Wolffolk

Attribute Points: 11

Min/Max:

Strength 2-6
Dexterity 1-6
Knowledge 1-4
Presence 1-5

Skill Distribution: 4/3/2

Special Skills: Tracking (scent) +4

Abilities: Darkvision

The American Wolffolk are a rarely seen cryptid species once found throughout the United States, but now having a much more limited range due to human encroachment.  They are now most visible in the current "swing state" of Michigan.  Despite the arguably negative impact of American "progress" on their species, the Wolffolk are often fiercely patriotic.  For example, they get really stoked when they get a chance to vote.

It is believed that this strong sense of national pride is due in large part to the love they have for their pack.  The ability to directly influence the decisions of their group is sacred to many Wolffolk.  Many have expressed concern at the systematic chipping away of rights that could ultimately lead to their disenfranchisement, but they are determined to get out the vote today to ensure that doesn't happen.

Geeky SKAturday: RxPxOxS (Fishbone)

Fishbone was one of the most popular American bands playing ska back in the 80s.  They're certainly legends of the genre, although they are probably known more for their eclecticism and unique high-energy blend of funk, metal, soul, punk, reggae, and on and on and on.

They unexpectedly released a new song on Thursday.  It is political and timely.

Let me be clear, because I know not everyone is going to like it...I truly want civility in political discourse.  I have cult members in my family and don't want to dehumanize anyone.  I believe in peace, probably to a fault as judged by most people...as in I believe there is power in peace, and in the cases where there are clearly more powerful forces at work, those are our chances as humans to give peace power.  BUT (I know you knew one was coming) I do occasionally need folks around me to be blunt enough to remind me that there's a lot going on in America right now that should not be normalized, and that there are ultimately convictions that matter.  In a world where I have been threatened and called a "liberal piece of shit" by a guy standing in my own backyard, I'm obligated to still try and recognize when things are...well, not okay.

Stay safe, everybody.

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Alright, let's lighten things up by giving the Rudie a sound from Fishbone.  How about the one that might be rudest of all of their rude stuff?

Skankin' to the Beat

1st-level Sound

Casting time: 1 bonus action

Range: 60 feet

Duration: 3 rounds

This sound gives all friendly creatures within range who dig the rhythm a boost to everything they attempt for the next 3 rounds.  When rolling for any skill check, magic check, attack, or save, they roll an extra 1D6 and add the result to the total.  Crits/bomb-outs/automatic successes or failures still count as usual.

(Too powerful?  Eh...good ;)

The Real Monstrous Matters: Oliphaunts in India

So this is pretty cool.  A pair of papers recently dropped giving a detailed analysis of a huge elephant skull that was found in India way back in 2000 (alongside a bunch of human tools).  And no, it isn't an Oliphaunt (or Mûmak)...but it is pretty darn big.

One of the papers focuses on the morphology and phylogeny of the skull (and thus the animal), placing it in the genus Palaeoloxodon, which has some of the largest elephants that ever walked the planet.  (There's a really good summary of this paper over at Discover Wildlife.)  It appears that this individual is a second example of a species previously named Palaeoloxodon turkmenicus, which in the range of 4 meters/13 feet at the shoulder (and around 10 tons) was certainly...well, mammoth:

P. turkmenicus and a human silhouette.  Image by Chen Yu; swiped from Discover Wildlife.

It's worth mentioning, though, that there's another species in the genus, Palaeoloxodon namadicus, that some estimates would place as the largest land animal ever at over 5 meters/17 feet, and up to 22 tons in weight!  Here's a nice little video on that one:

(The other paper, meanwhile, has more information on human interaction with the elephant, based upon marks on the bones and tools found nearby.  Both articles point to an age in the range of 300,000 to 400,000 years, which will never stop blowing my mind.)

Of course, even a 22-ton behemoth doesn't measure up to what we saw in Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings films:

From here

I'm not familiar enough with Tolkien's original works to know if that's the size we should expect based upon the books themselves, but man are they fantastic animals.  (What is it Sam tells Frodo?  "No one at home will believe this...")  They've got to be at least...what, 40 feet tall?  So if we assume, at the high end of Palaeoloxodon, a beast that's 17 feet tall and 22 tons...something roughly the same shape but about 2.35 times the height would probably give us an animal weighing about 13 times as much.  So...around 286 tons?  Did I do that right?  Impressive!  (The Mûmak, not my work...)

And the coolest part is that they're using them as war machines.  I'm sure there have been plenty of takes on Oliphaunts in RPGs over the years, but I think I'll just stat one out for Monstrous Matters purposes on the premise that it's a REALLY big elephant.  It looks like the flagship proboscidean has about 8 or 9 hit dice in a typical d20-based system.  Do I really want to make a Mûmak a monster with like 80 HD, or as I would play it in Monstrous Matters gaming, a Strength value of around 80?  (Rhetorical question...)

Considering the D6-based system I've been playing with, it probably makes the most sense to pull ideas from Mini Six (which includes elephant stats and some nice, simple scaling rules) and WEG's Star Wars Miniatures Battles (which has a nice way of handling creatures by not worrying so much about what humans consider intelligence, and instead giving them an Orneriness Code that's used to test how difficult they are to work with).

From here

Oliphaunt

Scale: +4

Handling Difficulty (trained): 7

20 HP, 11 Defense

Strength 4

Dexterity 1

Knowledge 1

Presence 1

Attacks: 2x Tusk (1D6+4 damage) or Trample (2D6+4 damage plus target is knocked prone)

EDIT:  And I realized I posted this without mentioning the most basic of courtesies...a Happy Halloween to everyone!